支招小作文（101） | 流程图 制作水泥和混凝土

流程图：类型一【制作工序】

写作关键：1）避免简答题式的写作（短小的句子扎堆；句子开头/主语趋同）。2）表工艺的动词；3）表过程中半成品的名词。4）通用的名词和动词。5）其它。

【开头段】

Shown in the diagrams are the process of cement production and that of using cement to produce concrete. Overall, the first process is complex, and the second is simple.

•  线图习惯用“graph”，饼图和柱/条状习惯用“chart”，流程图习惯用“diagram” 。

•  句开头的【倒装】。注意动词的单复数由倒置后的主语决定。

•  第二句是对于图表的【综述】，简要的讲一下流程图的【宏观全貌】。【套路】是写“图中的流程是复杂还是简单”。

•  注意句“and”前后的平行。

【主体部分第1段】写【制作水泥】

1. Cement production begins with putting limestone and clay – the raw materials – through the crusher to produce mixed powder.

2. The mixture needs to be further blended in the next device – the mixer.

3. Then, the mixture is transported into the rotating heater, which rotates in a clockwise direction.

4. At this step, heat is applied at the open end.

5. As the mixture is heated, it becomes a hot substance, which is the semi-product, for the final step.

6. The final step is to mill the hot substance into the ground cement, which will be bagged and used for the production of concrete.

•  第二句中，be further blended可以替换为“be thoroughly blended”或“be homogenized”。

•  “begins with”、“Then”、“At this step”、“As … (表时间/逻辑顺序的状语从句)”、“The final step”用来组织步骤的顺序。这些是文章脉络的得分的重点。

•  表工艺的动词是词汇得分的重点。

【主体部分第2段】写【制作混凝土】

To manufacture concrete, sand, gravel, and water are other essential components  in addition to cement. Their proportions are 25%, 50%, and 10%, and cement constitutes the other 15%. As those raw materials are put into the concrete blender that turns  clockwise, concrete is being produced.

•  右边的图，其实是个饼图。

•  句话，承上启下，让两个段落形成联系。这是文章脉络的得分的“妙笔”。

•  表工艺的动词 以及 通用的动词 是词汇得分的重点。

【结尾段】

Overall, the entire process, including making cement and using it to make concrete, is of certain complexity, going through a series of steps and a number of apparatuses.

•  如果开头段有了对于图表的综述，【其实可以没有结尾段】。

•  但是，要是想多拿分，写一个“加强版”的【图表综述】是必要的。

•  注意句“including”中“and”前后的平行。

注意【be + of + 名词】=【be + 这个名词对应的形容词】。例如：It is of social significance. = It is socially significant. 句中的“is of certain complexity” = “be complex to some extent”。

•  注意【伴随状语】，逻辑是“伴随着主句所讲的事情而发生”，功能是1）表结果；或2）表补充说明。这里是功能2）。

补充知识点：

1） 英语的宏观逻辑模式是“总——分”。

段落和单句都习惯采用这种模式。

单句举例：

It is a good idea that we go to the zoo.

首先让人知道“It is a good idea”，再让人知道“a good idea”是“that we go to the zoo”。

这个逻辑区别于中文的逻辑（如下）

That we go to the zoo today is a good idea.

2）构成的动词短语注意：

整体 consists of 几个部分。

整体 is composed of 几个部分。

几个细节 constitute 整体。

某个细节 constitutes 占比/多大的部分。如：My salary constitutes only a moderate portion of my income.